It never really occurred to me how superficial online dating could be. I’ve watched many online dating “horror stories,” and heard many stories about how disgusting the commentary can be on online dating sites. I came to an assumption that those scenarios were rare, but my opinion quickly changed once I tried it out for myself.
I found myself downloading the Tinder app out of curiosity. Then I found myself quickly deleting the app two weeks later as I began to realize not only how superficial the people who I received messages from were, but how superficial I had become.
Swiping left or right purely based on someone’s looks and my perception of how attractive I find the person is very “petty.” Without knowing anything about the person’s interests, likes or dislikes, hobbies, or even their personality, I had nothing to justify a “true match” as what’s left doesn’t holistically represent the person.
Some may argue that when you’re attracted to someone, it’s firstly due to physical attributes and secondly personality, but I believe it can work both ways.
There is also the argument that Tinder is purely based on satisfying immediate needs such as sexual pleasures or a day of companionship. But how can you find yourself getting along or hanging out with someone else when you are just attracted to their physical features?
The funny thing is that I became enveloped in this trap of shallowness, only swiping right to the faces I deemed highly attractive and swiping left to those I didn’t find as attractive without knowing if they would be a right match or not. By doing that I completely rejected potential match candidates. My ego was also inflamed with every match I got and becoming overwhelmed with messages from strangers that made me feel like a completely different person. I was no longer the genuine and humble person I know myself to be. I replied to many messages coming across as arrogant, exemplifying a completely different character.
There are many success stories from online dating, but based on my personal experience it brought out a completely different side of me rather than help me to find that “perfect match.”
