Waterloo’s getting glazed

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Photo Ju Hyun Kim
Photo Ju Hyun Kim

If you ever find yourself craving a doughnut, the new go-to spot is Vendor’s Alley in the SLC. This might seem like an odd suggestion, but let’s be realistic. With the surge of Krispy Kreme doughnut sales and propaganda pushing, SLC is the best place to feed your sugary, unhealthy needs.

You should probably stop spending your OSAP money on doughnuts, though.

Anyway, what’s up with these doughnuts being offered almost twice a week this semester? It can’t just be me  — in fact, odds are that there’s some doughnut sellers out as you read this article. Surely the sales must be dwindling with such fierce competition, right?

Turns out, it’s not. Executives from the Filipino Student’s Association, Because I Am A Girl, Global Medical/Dental Brigades, UWFLY, and the Chemical Engineering Society unanimously agreed that their sales are always successful.

So what is the profit margin? 

Filipino Student’s Association’s VP Finance, Patrick Dela Cruz, said “we usually purchase 40 boxes and make a profit of $200.”

Of the clubs interviewed, sales ranged from $200 to $280 in a day.

Is the free market too competitive? 

Shweta Suresh, the president of Because I Am A Girl, said, “It was harder to sell [the doughnuts] than it was last term. Last term, doughnuts were sold out by 2 p.m., but this term, we had about six boxes (out of the 50) left over, which we sold at our bake sale the next day. [They] all were gone within morning of the following day.”

“One of our main concerns going into the fundraiser was the fact that it literally happens every week … however, we were quite surprised after, as we sold most of the doughnuts we bought,” said Dishant Parikh, co-president of Global Medical/Dental Brigades.

“Now that there have been clubs selling Krispy Kreme doughnuts almost every week, I think people are starting to get tired of them, and clubs soon won’t be able to sell a lot of doughnuts,” said Cruz.

Is doughnut pushing the best way to fundraise?

“We have done many other fundraisers like basketball tournaments and bake sales … But, to date the Krispy Kreme sale has been our most successful fundraiser,” said Parikh.

“Our bake sales are pretty successful. We’ve been doing those for several terms now,” Suresh said.

Ok, but what about funding?

While most of the clubs interviewed haven’t contacted Feds about additional funding for their clubs, Parikh pointed out that “[the club executives] do feel as if the $75 is not sufficient to run many events. For the Krispy Kreme sale, all of the executives of [UWFLY] put in their own money to help purchase the doughnuts.”

I am a poor club, what now?

Deanna Priori, VP Internal of Feds, encouraged clubs to apply for additional funding at Feds.

“There are a few funds. One is the special project fund, which is a fund with $5,000. Clubs can apply on feds.ca under the funding page. The [application] goes to an internal funding committee and they decide how much to allot for the group that applied,” said Priori.

Another fund Priori mentioned is the Enterprise Opportunity and Innovation fund (EOI). “It’s a university fund … it is funded through the university, but allocated by Feds. The internal funding committee reviews the application and allots funds,” Priori said.

I don’t really want to do that …  but I still want funding. 

“Clubs can apply to endowment funds from different faculties, as long as you’re within that faculty [you can apply],” explained Priori.

Priori pointed out another option is “the dean’s offices of different faculties, [who] have money [and can] sometimes fund projects that help promote that faculty, usually for very specific things within that faculty.”

She also explained that groups partner with other groups to help fund projects. For example, Health Services partnered with the Mindfulness Club.”

So I could apply for funding, instead of shoving doughnut sales?

Priori encouraged students to make use of the funding options available, noting that “the funds are underutilized because clubs forget [that these funds are there for them].”

“These funds are for clubs and other student groups to use. If they are looking for [funds], these are great options,” Priori said.

Do I stop selling doughnuts?

Obviously not, the constant sales have conditioned students to obtain a constant sugar high. Withdrawal is, obviously, a problem we don’t need Feds’ new executives to worry about.

Stay tuned for next week’s follow-up guide: How to lose all that Krispy Kreme fat.

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